I'm such a Failure

My simple weekend goal of finishing a book is looking less and less likely. Reasons for this failure are as follows:

• Kerry.
  
• Heroes, the TV show Kerry talked me into watching on Friday. My Saturday afternoon I'd seen the entire season to date. Its somewhat addictive. Kerry knew it and he let me start anyway.
• Wings. Melissa, Dana, and I went to Wild Wings for dinner and ate a metric ton of spicy goodness. At my new weight of 467 lbs I am unable to fit through my door, and my book is trapped in my room, helpless and alone.
  
• Diane Keaton. Melissa and I went to see "Because I Said So". It was so funny and wrong. My favorite combination.
• Da Bears. Any hope of a last minute recovery tomorrow is shot.
  

So there you have it. What seems like a very nice weekend is actually a series of unfortunate events preventing me from finishing the very exciting Marie Antoinnette novel. Ugh! Curse my popularity and good taste in television, food, films and sports!!!