Everything I know about Men

I read some funny blog stuff online tonight and it got me thinking.

I also saw a sign outside C-House that read "Vote No on Amendment #1. Visit: dumbamendment.com". It made me absurdly happy. Earlier I drafted a long blog about the apathy of America's youth, but chose not to publish it for reasons best explained by the phrase "Well if that ain't the pot calling the kettle black"

Onward. Its been an introspective day and I have some thoughts.

Relationships are complex. Not one is the same as another. There are categories, heterosexual, marriage, friendship, casual, etc. I think different people are made for different kinds. Personally, I (a twentysomething college student living somewhere she never plans to settle) have found that the relationship type that works for me is open, casual, polygamy. I'm not saying I have 8 husbands, but I am dating 3 men right now. They know it, its cool.

I am aware that this is not a common way to live, and I also don't care. Screw convention.

I don't know when I "found myself", I think I always knew where I was, I just poked around in other places a bit for the heck of it before I picked myself up. Like when you play hide and seek with a kid. You look in closets and under the rug before discovering them with great surprise under the table. Or maybe I just did it one small piece at a time and eventually there I was. Either way, I am all sorted out and very happy. Kerry says I'm old for my age. I disagree. I think most 21 year olds are young for their age.

Which brings me to this. I'm over people that aren't. I'm not interested in fixing people anymore. If you have baggage, sort it out yourself, or find another baggage-laden person and deal with it together. I'm happy to help people with their difficult decisions, or listen to them vent, but at the end of the day I'm not a psychiatrist and am not going into that field for a reason. I just want to be around people who don't hate themselves, or their bodies, or the world.

So after about 7 years of dating, here is what I know about men. Or, rather, what I know about choosing them.

Appearance: Physically, a man should be big enough to beat me up (not a difficult task, ask my sister). I have a fetish for tall, lanky men (I love you Adrien Brody), but I like all kinds.
Facially, a man should have an expressive, groomed face. Expressive in that we can exchange meaningful glances and groomed in that whatever hair is there, is there intentionally. Clothes aren't important.

Personality: I look for a man who is funny. Having a sense of humor isn't enough. I want him to make me laugh. I want him to have a sense of humor about himself, to be able to take a joke at his own expense.
A man should have principles and integrity. Believe in something- cooking, kung fu movies, politics, college sports- and speak about it with conviction.
A man needs to be honest-when-necessary. Do you like my obscenely expensive impractical shoes? Lie. Do you want to spend the day shopping for obscenely expensive impractical shoes? Truth. Some lies breed resentment which turns right into baggage.
Good-natured men are best. Men who don't let the little things get them down or get angry easily.
Finally, a man should be strong enough to question me, say "no" to me, and sometimes tell me what to do. "Yes dear" makes me feel like a bitch.

I would date any man with these qualities. Anything else is just flavor, variety, the spice of life. Girls who have some picture of "the perfect man" in their heads are crazy. No one is perfect. And everyone is likable.

And it is now 1:30am. Class in exactly 8 hours.
Goodnight.